TODAY HAS BEEN ONE OF THOSE DAYS...

Today has been one of those days…

Today has been one of those days. One of those days when the basic emotions fight between them so hard that you cannot even know what you are feeling. One year ago it was the kick off of the shooting of Autumn without Berlin. I just strolled by the locations where we shot and I felt joy. Joy for having achieved finishing the film and being now sharing the emotions we are getting into the audience.

After watching the news, I saw a man killed another woman in a town near-by. Rage occupied every pore of my skin. And I hated this rotten society that I do not understand and kills women non-stop.

After that, I got afraid when I thought that I am not going to live in a fair society with women, life is so brief to witness so much change. I am not going to see equality in the streets, nor in the world of cinema. And I got even more afraid when I thought that I do not know if next generations would do it. Even hope is lost during one of these days…

When I got home it was the turn for sadness; I knew about the death of Chantal Akerman. A standard for women filmmakers, an example to follow, a lighthouse between some much darkness, a straightforward woman who believed in her cinema above all things, a myth… I knew her during one of the lectures. She was quite ill but had blue eyes that sparkled like the little girl’s eyes.

I am going to bed and I do not care about anything. The first aniversary of the beginning of the shooting has been quite sad. And the South wind have been blowing hard.